I got dressed and ready for a house party and I’ve been up stairs 97% (and counting) of the time I’ve been here
….which is somewhere around an hour and a half now
I’ve progressed into and individual that prefers lounges (to chill) and bars (to drink) or bein laid underneath my man to crowded ass house parties with sweaty ass people..
It’s just old, that’s all I’m saying.
Nothing much to be impressed by.
I really need to start meeting new people because this small parameter of an idea of “entertainment” is rather sad.
My emotion has no logic..
None what so ever
I wear them on my sleeve
Not for the sake of being wishful or hopeful, but for the sake of displaying honesty
what is a successful relationship (romantic or platonic) without honesty?
I might possibly be the most emotional woman I know
When I’m close to the one I give myself to I don’t see why it isn’t natural to submit…what the hell does it take for men to submit?
But people take advantage even when they don’t mean to. It’s human nature
..which is rather unfortunate, especially for me, because when I fall, I fall hard and I look to be caught and I have NO problem expressing it
… . .I wish my thought process was not mine
So many things have changed
over the short period of a month and a half (more so in the past 2 weeks).
And my perspective on so many things have changed as well..
~Friendships ~Relationships (romantic and family) ~My self/work ethic/determination
it’s definitely frustrating to want to see a change in things so bad that you try to change them yourself. But way too often do we forget that we do not control things around here.
And letting go of your anxieties and just going with the flow of things (even if you don’t like it) is so much easier than being outrageously stressed about what you can’t do.
Doing what you can brings you everything your SUPPOSED to have and puts you everywhere you’re SUPPOSED to be.
So…
A new semester has started. And I’m coming back from a rough finish (Fall ‘11) to say the least. Luckily I’m within standing to pull myself back up from where I landed on my ass (academically and in life in general)
BUT.. I don’t like (a lot of things that are not about to be mentioned) and it’s holding me back from making the progress I know my ass has been brought up to and planned on making all my life.
I just have to give myself a little pep talk and remind myself of what’s on the line and how many people are relying on me to do the best. (yes, Garland and his Ferrari included, lol)
It’s really easy to get off track.. but it’s so refreshing to WANT to do better and push yourself in better standing by your own standards.
Plenty of prayer.
Plenty of focus.